The White Knight gets a bad rap because of its association with narcissism. While this is true, there are much deeper implications surrounding a “white knight” than narcissistic traits such as limited self-awareness, or a grandiose attitude based on larger-than-life gestures and showmanship.
The “Save Me” Syndrome has an equally bad rap associated with severe dependency, learned helplessness and a lack of autonomy. When we examine it under these conditions, it loses all romanticism.
It is true that White Knights are attracted to a needy partner, often those with histories of childhood trauma, abuse, neglect, or addiction because this taps into their own need to be needed. Many, if not most, are hypersensitive to their partner’s feelings, and their desire to be rescued. If their partner refuses their grand gestures in trying to ‘fix’ or ‘save’ them, a White Knight can become bitter, paranoid, and internalize this as a personal rejection.