Cry those tears. Express your pain. Feel your emotions that can fill your eyes and spill over, many times without warning.
I don’t run from them anymore, wiping them away quickly in an effort to stuff them down really deep and pretend that everything is ok. I don’t will them back into my eyes because I don’t have time to process the very real emotions that come with living this life. I don’t physically feel ill when I feel it start to bubble up all over my body as a warning sign.
I feel them.
I weep them.
I honor them as they show me the way forward if I really listen.
Feelings are hard when you are trained to avoid them or explain them away.
Feelings are even harder when you are a walking emotion who absorbs emotion from everything around them.
PS. We are all walking emotions.
So here I am. Feeling. Crying.
I am preparing to leave a piece of my heart in London this week. And I’m steeped in Grateful Grief, with a capital G.
I’ve found this to be the best explanation for this feeling…that no words seem to capture. The happiness I’ve had with my beautiful soul of a daughter…is mixed with what feels like a death on so many levels. A rebirth on others. And an evolution on all of them.