I declined the experience of dying (temporarily) at my first opportunity. I had watched all the YouTube videos of people falling over, writhing in the sand, and recounting their experiences of revelation. For most, it was a revelation of the oneness of all. That is most of what psychedelics do; they clue us into the miracle of connection. But first, our poor little egos must be pushed out of the way.
I have nothing against the toad, Bufo Alvarious, clever little things. When they are anxious, they shoot out a psychedelic substance. I wish we could do that. It would make life so much easier. No, it was not the toad that was the problem but the people.