I had a discussion recently about the pain in my life — perhaps even the pain of being transgender. My friend commented I hadn’t really taken responsibility in my life.
At first, I became frantic, anxious, glancing around like a caged honey badger. How could my actions be so unclear? All I ever did in life was take responsibility. I gave so much; I was always empty. Even now, more than a year into gender transition — one of the few decisions I’ve made purely for myself — I feel empty. Or at the very least, I’m certainly not full.
Gender transition is — by its nature — selfish. We cannot transition for somebody else. We cannot transition to make others happy.